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	<title>Comments on: How does my resume look? what can i improve?</title>
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	<description>Computer Asset Management</description>
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		<title>By: Carlos</title>
		<link>http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/comment-page-1/#comment-734</link>
		<dc:creator>Carlos</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 06:54:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/#comment-734</guid>
		<description>Your resumé is impresive, especially your experience, but their is some errors which pose a threat to your resumé, 
first of all, you have three years in management, so this doesn&#039;t make you a starter.

As of your objective write.

To acquire a position with an opportunity for professional growth in a people-oriented organization where advancement in Management is based upon skills and contributions.  

Or

Management position with growth-oriented company offering opportunity for advancement and professional development. 

Make sure that your objetive is short and attractive, such as the one I wrote here.

As of your education, dont inlcude the courses which you took.  Just include the year you graduated in.

Remember its very important to keep your resume under one page, try limiting the wording in your employement section.

B.A. HRM
Carlos&lt;br&gt;&lt;b&gt;References : &lt;/b&gt;&lt;br&gt;HR Professional</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Your resumé is impresive, especially your experience, but their is some errors which pose a threat to your resumé,<br />
first of all, you have three years in management, so this doesn&#8217;t make you a starter.</p>
<p>As of your objective write.</p>
<p>To acquire a position with an opportunity for professional growth in a people-oriented organization where advancement in Management is based upon skills and contributions.  </p>
<p>Or</p>
<p>Management position with growth-oriented company offering opportunity for advancement and professional development. </p>
<p>Make sure that your objetive is short and attractive, such as the one I wrote here.</p>
<p>As of your education, dont inlcude the courses which you took.  Just include the year you graduated in.</p>
<p>Remember its very important to keep your resume under one page, try limiting the wording in your employement section.</p>
<p>B.A. HRM<br />
Carlos<br /><b>References : </b><br />HR Professional</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>By: Alan S</title>
		<link>http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/comment-page-1/#comment-733</link>
		<dc:creator>Alan S</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 06:44:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/#comment-733</guid>
		<description>I&#039;m not sure you need an objective, especially if you are sending your resume in response to specific job opportunities.  I think that would normally go in a cover letter or email.  Also, if you wanted to apply for a different type of job you would have to change or remove the objective.  My understanding is that the &quot;References Available Upon Request&quot; is unnecessary.  However, if the objective and references are helping to make your resume longer so it takes up a full page, maybe its better to keep them in.

I&#039;m not clear if you are looking for a retail position or something in another field.  If you are looking for management positions outside of retail, some of your job duties may not be fully clear to the reader.  For example, I don&#039;t know what an &quot;end cap&quot; or &quot;inline department&quot; is.  But I think overall, most of the terms would be understandable by anyone, so this is a minor point.  And if the people who will be reading your resume know what these terms mean, you shouldn&#039;t change it.

Under your employment, I&#039;m not sure if the sentence &quot;Verify vendor invoice...&quot; is grammatically correct.  I know that the rules for resumes are different than if you were writing an essay, so it may be ok.  You should get some additional advice on this, perhaps someone else here will have better feedback on that line.

For your education, I don&#039;t think you need to include the years you attended, or the month of your degree - just the year of your degree.  I don&#039;t think you need to list the courses you took, because these are typical courses that would be required for your degree.  If you took a course that is not normally a part of the degree program that you think might be useful to list, that would be different.  It would also be a good idea to list any minors you earned, if applicable.  If you had a good GPA, you might want to include that also.  I&#039;m not sure about listing the city and state of your school.  I don&#039;t do that on mine, but I went to SUNY Stony Brook and SUNY Albany, so the state and city are obvious.  I&#039;d have no idea where your school was, so what you&#039;re doing is probably correct.  I actually list the city and state of my jobs, which you don&#039;t.

I&#039;m also confused about the major.  Isn&#039;t the subject of the degree the same as the major?  For example, my degree was a B.S. in Applied Mathematics and Statistics, and that was my major.

If you did this in a manner similar to what I have on my resume, it would say:
Rio Hondo College, Whittier, CA
A.S., 2008, Business Management and Supervision

Please take into account that my comments on the education section don&#039;t account for the fact that you may need to fill up empty space, so maybe the way you have it is fine.

I don&#039;t have a skills profile on mine.  I&#039;m a computer programmer and I think the skills are described in my various jobs.  Also, most of my skills are very outdated so I don&#039;t think a skills section would help me much.  I used to have a section listing skills, and I think in your case I think it is a good idea.&lt;br&gt;&lt;b&gt;References : &lt;/b&gt;&lt;br&gt;Really I&#039;m only basing my comments on my own resume (which is somewhat similar in style to yours), and there are so many different ways and styles of doing things.  I would suggest consulting with a number of people (Yahoo answers might be a good way to accomplish this, but I would talk to friends and relatives also).  If you haven&#039;t done this already there is probably a career counselor at your school that would be happy to help.  Then you can pick and choose what advice you want to use and what advice you don&#039;t like.  Just make sure there are no errors.  This looks pretty good to me.  While people may read your resume and reject you because they don&#039;t think you are qualified for the position or have other candidates who they feel are more qualified, I don&#039;t see any reason why someone would reject you because they didn&#039;t like how your resume looked to them.  It seems to be very well written and I didn&#039;t see any obvious errors (other than the one thing I mentioned, which may or may not be ok).</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m not sure you need an objective, especially if you are sending your resume in response to specific job opportunities.  I think that would normally go in a cover letter or email.  Also, if you wanted to apply for a different type of job you would have to change or remove the objective.  My understanding is that the &quot;References Available Upon Request&quot; is unnecessary.  However, if the objective and references are helping to make your resume longer so it takes up a full page, maybe its better to keep them in.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m not clear if you are looking for a retail position or something in another field.  If you are looking for management positions outside of retail, some of your job duties may not be fully clear to the reader.  For example, I don&#8217;t know what an &quot;end cap&quot; or &quot;inline department&quot; is.  But I think overall, most of the terms would be understandable by anyone, so this is a minor point.  And if the people who will be reading your resume know what these terms mean, you shouldn&#8217;t change it.</p>
<p>Under your employment, I&#8217;m not sure if the sentence &quot;Verify vendor invoice&#8230;&quot; is grammatically correct.  I know that the rules for resumes are different than if you were writing an essay, so it may be ok.  You should get some additional advice on this, perhaps someone else here will have better feedback on that line.</p>
<p>For your education, I don&#8217;t think you need to include the years you attended, or the month of your degree &#8211; just the year of your degree.  I don&#8217;t think you need to list the courses you took, because these are typical courses that would be required for your degree.  If you took a course that is not normally a part of the degree program that you think might be useful to list, that would be different.  It would also be a good idea to list any minors you earned, if applicable.  If you had a good GPA, you might want to include that also.  I&#8217;m not sure about listing the city and state of your school.  I don&#8217;t do that on mine, but I went to SUNY Stony Brook and SUNY Albany, so the state and city are obvious.  I&#8217;d have no idea where your school was, so what you&#8217;re doing is probably correct.  I actually list the city and state of my jobs, which you don&#8217;t.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m also confused about the major.  Isn&#8217;t the subject of the degree the same as the major?  For example, my degree was a B.S. in Applied Mathematics and Statistics, and that was my major.</p>
<p>If you did this in a manner similar to what I have on my resume, it would say:<br />
Rio Hondo College, Whittier, CA<br />
A.S., 2008, Business Management and Supervision</p>
<p>Please take into account that my comments on the education section don&#8217;t account for the fact that you may need to fill up empty space, so maybe the way you have it is fine.</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t have a skills profile on mine.  I&#8217;m a computer programmer and I think the skills are described in my various jobs.  Also, most of my skills are very outdated so I don&#8217;t think a skills section would help me much.  I used to have a section listing skills, and I think in your case I think it is a good idea.<br /><b>References : </b><br />Really I&#8217;m only basing my comments on my own resume (which is somewhat similar in style to yours), and there are so many different ways and styles of doing things.  I would suggest consulting with a number of people (Yahoo answers might be a good way to accomplish this, but I would talk to friends and relatives also).  If you haven&#8217;t done this already there is probably a career counselor at your school that would be happy to help.  Then you can pick and choose what advice you want to use and what advice you don&#8217;t like.  Just make sure there are no errors.  This looks pretty good to me.  While people may read your resume and reject you because they don&#8217;t think you are qualified for the position or have other candidates who they feel are more qualified, I don&#8217;t see any reason why someone would reject you because they didn&#8217;t like how your resume looked to them.  It seems to be very well written and I didn&#8217;t see any obvious errors (other than the one thing I mentioned, which may or may not be ok).</p>
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	<item>
		<title>By: wpgeezer</title>
		<link>http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/comment-page-1/#comment-732</link>
		<dc:creator>wpgeezer</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 06:34:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://computerassetmanagement.org/668/how-does-my-resume-look-what-can-i-improve/#comment-732</guid>
		<description>Try to read your resume as a perspective employer. It looks like a blatant attempt to expand a shift managers job to store manager. It is well written, but you will need letters of recommendation with names and phone numbers. They will assume you occasionally filled in for the manager. A phone call is usually as far as they go to validate it. If you were fired, try a friends phone and name. It could work.&lt;br&gt;&lt;b&gt;References : &lt;/b&gt;&lt;br&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Try to read your resume as a perspective employer. It looks like a blatant attempt to expand a shift managers job to store manager. It is well written, but you will need letters of recommendation with names and phone numbers. They will assume you occasionally filled in for the manager. A phone call is usually as far as they go to validate it. If you were fired, try a friends phone and name. It could work.<br /><b>References : </b></p>
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