DO YOU HAVE A BAD BOSS?
Signs of Bad Management
By Eliza Farnsworth
I’m not a bitter person. Actually, I am, but I’m also smart, which separates me from the commonly bitter. See, I don’t like my managers. You’d think elite intelligence would be an asset in an organization, but my superiors see it as a threat to their existence, which in truth I am, but it’s not like their ineptitude is fooling anybody.
Cocky little Napoleons. Sometimes I wish I could transport them to a planet populated only by them and my ex-boyfriends, where they could breed an imperfect species that would evolve into rock form. But I digress.
In truth, not all management people are jerks. Some are tolerable, mainly those who, like mice in the walls, are rarely seen or heard. Unfortunately, my current manager is a Neanderthal who does everything Neanderthalish except drag his knuckles on the floor.
Here are my three top issues with managers and how to catch them at their own game.
The manager with "obsessive meeting disorder"
If you’re Eisenhower and you’re planning a D-day invasion, then call as many meetings as necessary. If you’re a white collar mammal whose largest aspiration in life is to have an office with a window, then fill my calendar at your own risk. I say if your manager calls more than three meetings per week, reciprocate by having each team member schedule one-on-one meetings with him or her to summarize each said meeting.
The manager who says, "I’m just like you"
But with a better paid title. When a manager tries to ingratiate himself into the common man’s world, it’s a telltale sign they are sleeping on the couch at home. And don’t be fooled by their pingpong tournaments. It’s a ruse to see who isn’t working and grounds to reassign you if you beat them. I say play along; sign up for any tournament and lose in the first round.
The manager whose "door is always open"
But whose soul is closed and dark. Anyone who informs you of their open-door policy prays that no one will actually take them up on it. I say take them at their word. Notify them of a manager in the office who everyone takes issue with. This will add to their paranoid delusions and lead them to a new career path at the local nursery.
(HAVE YOU EVER HAD A BOSS LIKE ONE OF THESE????)
I am not sure it is wise to complain about ones management on the internet.
I am not sure it is wise to complain about ones management on the internet.
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